shallow thoughts by csolly: November 2002

I'm having a wonderful time here at home in Missouri. A few nights ago, Mom "whooped some booty" (her words, not mine!) at Scrabble. She did last night too. That woman is great at Scrabble. Put Dad and I to shame. Last night, I hung out with my old pal Anne. Anne and I met in high school, so we've known each other for about 10 years, making her one of my oldest friends that I still keep in touch with. Instead of being freaked out by how long we've known each other (and thusly how old we're geting) we are delighted about it. She's the doctor country mouse and I'm the writer city mouse. Besides those differences, though, we do have a lot in common still. Oh, I could go on and on about how great Anne is, but I'll stop there. We took a midnight hot tub until we were two 5-foot-tall prunes, and then we made a late-night run to Steak 'n' Shake for cheese fries. (You Easterners -- and Westerners -- who will never know the wonders of the Steak 'n' Shake chain are missing out!) Which brings me to ... What I Am Thankful For. The list is short. It's you. I am most thankful for my family and friends, without whom this very rough year-and-a-half would not have been as bearable. I am bright and cheerful about my situation, even though I could easily melt into a puddle of tears, if I cared to do so. And it's because of you, friends new and old, that have made me feel great about everything along the way. Thank you, and happy Thanksgiving. :D

Ahhh ... how nice is it to go to sleep in a bed that my mother made with flannel sheets, just for me, because she knew I was feeling chilly? Very nice, even if it is a twin bed. I made it here to St. Louis without incident. I breezed through the self-check-in (love it!) and through the security checkpoints, which seem to have multiplied like rabbits. I still have not read The Lord of the Rings. (Christmastime last year, I told myself that I would like to have read at least through The Two Towers by the time the movie comes out.) So, instead of packing my usual assortment of reading materials (magazines and some other light reading), I brought with me The Lord of the Rings, and only The Lord of the Rings. Nothing at the airport or on the plane bothered me because my nose was in the pages of the book for the duration of the entire evening. And it's so good! I had started it before, once, but got a little stuck, as I was 80 pages into it and the hobbits were just starting their journey. Snore. Hobbits walking through the woods. Hobbits walking through a field. Hobbits cross a stream. But, by plugging through a good amount yesterday, I've gotten beyond that and into some great stuff. I'm excited to do a lot of reading while I'm here at Mom and Dad's. So, on that note, I sign off. Going to find some yummy breakfast-type foods in the copious cupbourds and snuggle up in front of the fireplace with Frodo and friends (all the while consciously ignoring the fact that over 200 channels of glorious digital cable lay only a few feet away).

Last Night, Heather and Dan's apartment, Sopranos Sunday complete with Thanksgiving dinner Caryn: They have Thanksgiving in Canada too, right? Dan: Yep. Caryn: What do you guys do to celebrate? Dan: Same thing. Big meal. We eat all the same things. Thanksgiving there is in October. Caryn: ... What does Canadian Thanksgiving celebrate? Dan: I don't know. Dinner was awesome. I walked-subwayed-walked home doubled over because I was so full. And I didn't even have dessert! Thank you!

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! I think my DVD player is broken!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh! The interview! So glad you asked ... It went super. I'm perfect for the job. I was very well prepared. I'm quite anal about job interviews because they're so important to me. So, though I may be lazy and/or sloppy in other parts of my life, I leave nothing to chance when it come to job interviews. (As opposed to some who just "wing it.") I wore my suit (despite the pleated pants; I just kept the jacket closed) which looked hot with the high heels. (Damn those were a good purchase.) I showed up a half-hour early and sat on a banch at a nearby park, and chatted with Mom on the phone to get some last-minute good vibes. My clips and resume looked pretty and I felt great before I even went in. I first interviewed with an HR woman who did nothing to put me at ease. I hated her questions. She took some notes but appeared to have no reaction to any of my answers, so I had absolutely no feel for how well I was doing. But, after that, she sent me upstairs to interview with my would-be boss. He was great and we got along very well. Laughing, joking, etc. He told me about what the department is responsible for and how I would fit into it. Each time he mentioned a different duty, I was able to counter with "I've done that" or "I can do that." I felt great. I have a writing test to complete this weekend, but I've already looked at it and looks to be a cinch. I don't know how many others their interviewing or when they're going to make a decision. So, we'll see. :D

Hee - Progress is being made! This morning was the first that I woke up, smelled the clothes I wore to the bar the night before, and was grossed out by the nasty smokiness of them. I've been Febreezing my coat all morning trying to get the smell out. And I'm getting such a kick out of it.

Awww, what a nice night I've had. Marcia came over for dinner and we had a great long talk. (Yes, I made dinner. Shock-shock.) I hadn't seen her in a long time, so it was great to have a whole evening to ourselves to catch up. Then I came online after she left, and ended up chatting with my med-student friend from high school, Anne. We've already made vague plans to hang out next week when I go back to St. Louis. And I caught Mike L online, and got to find out what he's been up to also. And now I'm going to curl up into bed with one of the three books I'm in the middle of, The Art of Happiness by His Holiness The Dalai Lama, an old gift from Will. I highly recommend it. It's a little dry, but worth reading. It's the second time I'm reading it, and I think when I finish I'd like to check out some of his other books. He's a very wise person that I admire a lot. OK, that's enough. Going to bed. G'night.

Wow-wee! Things are happening! Not only do I have an interview tomorrow for a job, but I've already set up two more for the week after Thanksgiving! All editorial positions! Hooray!!!

Anyone know how to settle a nervous stomach? I've had it ever since I found out about my job interview. If you know me well, you probably know I have a "get it over with" attitude toward tough nerve-wracking things, so the fact that I haven't gotten to do my interview yet is annoying to me. If it were up to me, we sould have done it yesterday. But, I still have a day-and-a-half to go before these butterflies would settle themselves, but I'd like to exterminate them sooner. If you have any tips, please get in touch.

Supposedly, there is a day of the year that more people quit smoking annually than New Years Day. Join me and quit smoking tomorrow, November 21, The Great American Smokeout. Your friends, family, body and -- most importantly -- YOU will be so glad you did. Someone told me once that today is the easiest day you will ever have to quit; it will only get harder. I'm happy to lend support to any friends of mine who want to quit (as you all have been so supportive of me - thank you!), but here are some other resources to help you quit. truth American Cancer Society Smoking Cessation at About.com ... if you are a smoker reading this, I know that you're probably not going to quit tomorrow. You'll quit when you're ready, which is just what you should do. The inspiration will come someday. And, if you want it, I'll give you any help you need when that time comes.

Before you ask, my interview has been rescheduled to Friday.

Big day for csolly: * I got called for my first interview of this job search! Hallelujah! Wish me luck! (Interivew is tomorrow.) * Today is Day 50 of Caryn: The Non-Smoker * I bought high-heels and pantyhose for the first time in ages. (Did you know that L'eggs don't come in eggs anymore?) I'm going out for drinks tonight and good thing: I've got stuff to celebrate. :D

Orchid: what are you up to besides moping on blogger? See Solly: i'm actually not very mopey at all Orchid: oh Orchid: well that is great See Solly: i had an awesome weekend See Solly: and a relaxing day today Orchid: niiice See Solly: the good things that happened to me this weekend were all too personal to blog about :D Orchid: ooooo! Orchid: meee yow honey! See Solly: (no no, nothing sexy, just personally fulfilling) Orchid: i can meeee yow for personally fulfulling Orchid: lol No worries, everyone. I'm actually in a fantastic mood. Carry on.

How far have I come in eliminating my unhealthy habits that, today, my biggest vice was a Super-Sized Coca-Cola?

It's a little hard to stay cheerful and hopeful about being laid off (for the second time in little more than a year) and trying to find a new job that I will be happy with; when you get an email from a friend (who has been steadily employed and very well compensated since she graduated college) who has just gotten a new job herself, which is taking her career where she wants to go, now has more vacation time, tuition reimbursement, less hours at the office and her new company is one I'd chop off my hair to work for. And she's engaged to a recently graduated medical student. Grrr. Breathe in, and out. Breathe in, and out.

Spooky, huh? (In case you're not sure, that's my brother on the right.)

I did it to myself. I've been on this hyper streak for two and a half days, and (not realizing it at the time) I wasn't really eating during that time. At all. I think I had a few nibbles (I must have) and I was drinking water. But not a meal. How could I possibly think I could go 2.5 days without eating a be OK? Well, it all caught up to me this afternoon and I doubled over into bed with a stomachache and a headache. Stupid stupid. I'm fine now and I've eaten. In other news, Matt and Kari (my bro and his gf) have finally moved into a place of their own -- and they have Internet access. Woo hoo! In this age of digi-communication, I haven't been too good about keeping up with them (because they were never online to chat with and couldn't check email). But now, I can! I had a nice long chat with Kari tonight. Very excited that I'll be keeping up with them more. I was starting to feel a bit guilty about not calling more often. Well, I'm off to batten down the hatches for the storm that's a-headin' our way. (Battening down the hatches in Caryn-speak means stocking up on rented DVDs and cans of Coca-Cola. Used to mean buying cigarettes too, but not this time.)

Today, I've had more energy than I've had in a long time. I couldn't sit still. I cleaned the bathtub and installed a towel rack. I cleaned out the bathroom cabinet and hung up the most recent additions to my postcard collection. I threw away a ton of old makeup and neatened my books. I filled out the application to consolidate my student loans and did three loads of laundry. I'm always up for a movie, and, despite being home most of the day, I didn't make it through a single one today (though I started two and walked away from both because I couldn't sit still). It's about one in the morning and I'm still pretty wired. I don't think I can go to bed yet. What has gotten into me? And my apartment is Ashton Kutcher hot. (That's very, very hot.) I have the window wide open right next to me, and I'm still warm. Blech. Must talk to Super. P.S. I was the big winner at poker tonight. Go me. (Thanks, boys!) P.P.S. It's been over a month and a half since I last puffed on a ciggie. Hoorah. I'm getting a little snooty about it too. Gotta cut that out.

Hee. That Skin show was actually pretty cool. I enjoyed it. ... Wahahahahahah! ... the cat just rolled off the dresser! The big cat, not the stupid little one. Haha! (Oh, I can laugh. He always lands on his feet.)

Lately, I watch a lot more television than I should, but that's not what I want to talk about right now. I was just checking TV Guide online. Tonight on PBS is a National Geographic program about skin. It looks to be a very stimlutaing program with great scientific insights, like this one: In Africa, anthropologist Nina Jablonski explores why some people have darker skin than others. Her explanation: the hotter the climate, the darker the skin. It is, she says, “a biological adaptation to the environment." Tonight's program will be hosted by Captain Obvious.

Where, Oh Where, Can That Little Job Be? Today I saw a listing for a job at a magazine called Atlanta Homes & Lifestyles. And one at Colorado Homes & Lifestyles. If you're not aware, I interened for two summers at St. Louis Homes & Lifestyles. (Are we all following along?) Anyway, I'm not sure whether I should apply for those other jobs or not. The likelihood that I will actually want to relocate is about 5% -- though Colorado could be really cool. And, I wouldn't want to go through the trouble of calling my old publisher and asking her to put in a good word for me if I'm not serious about the positions. Money Money Money I paid all my bills yesterday. Go me. I'm horrible at it, as most of you also know. I always take too long to pay them. I've tried different things: Excel spreadsheets, Microsoft Money, notes by the door, opening the mail right away, sending bills according to my pay schedule. Can't do it. I think it must be some sort of mental block. I pretend they're not there. For weeks. Right now, the system involves a freshly-organized desk and several always-open notebooks (in which I've been keeping job notes and phone messages). I know this isn't going to work either. Anyone got advice for getting over a mental block, short of professional help? (I'd forget to pay a shrink anyway.) Kitten Sniffs Hand: Film at 11 Things with the kitten are getting better. He'll smell my hand occassionally when I reach it toward him. We still play on the floor together a lot. I posted on the About.com Cats forum yesterday, asking for any other tips people might have for training a feral kitten. People wrote back very nice things, a lot of which I already knew. The one new tip I got was not to look him in the eye. That was something that was bothering me -- that he wouldn't ever really look at me -- but now I'm told that's a feline sign of aggression. And, actually, it's helping. When I interact with him, I look at him through the corner of my eye, and he'll approach much more easily. (I know that's helpful to you because you have a feral kitten at home too, of course. I'm always looking out for you. ... You don't have a kitten? Oh, well, forget this paragraph then.)

Having worked at a commercial web site, I know one or two things about Internet advertising. The click-through rate on banner ads is something like .03% now. Something horrid. Anyway, I just clicked on a banner ad. For the first time in years. (Well, that wasn't by accident anyway.)

I haven't had a cigarette in 42 days.

Did you see 1940s House on PBS this week? It was a wonderful BBC show about a family who lived as a family would have during WWII in London, complete with air raids and food rationing. So well done, very educational and inspiring. Makes me wish I'd seen more of Frontier House and 1900 House. Maybe I can catch them another time. (This has got to be some sign of getting older, but PBS is my favorite channel on TV. Too bad Paul doesn't work there anymore to ... I dunno, get me a free copy of Graham Haley's Hints? Or a job.) Just looking stuff up about the show ... The follow-up doesn't sound as inspiring. (Old news, huh?)

I'm still here ... Heather visited me for the weekend. We had some drinks (well, I did), saw a bad movie in the theater, cheered on marathoners. We had a good time, except for the part where she was robbed of her credit cards. She actually came back to the city yesterday because she had to file a police report in person in order to grease the wheels of the machine that will get back her money. Once that chore was out of the way, we wandered around the city and stumbled over popstars Justin Timberlake and Nick Carter across the street from one another. Strange.

shallow thoughts by csolly

Thursday, November 28, 2002

Tuesday, November 26, 2002

Monday, November 25, 2002

Saturday, November 23, 2002

Thursday, November 21, 2002

Wednesday, November 20, 2002

Tuesday, November 19, 2002

Monday, November 18, 2002

Sunday, November 17, 2002

Friday, November 15, 2002

Wednesday, November 13, 2002

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

Monday, November 11, 2002

Sunday, November 10, 2002

Wednesday, November 06, 2002

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